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Post by carmensandiego on Aug 16, 2021 11:52:17 GMT
I thought it might be nice to have a thread devoted to sharing about BOOKS you have found personally helpful or useful as an ex-PR or someone trying to leave. I didn’t find a thread like this when I searched, but its entirely possible I missed it…
I’ll start by sharing one I just finished and can’t stop thinking about. This book came out a few years ago, but I only just got around to reading it. It’s called Educated, by Tara Westover. The author is a young woman who was born to survivalist parents in Idaho. She recounts her unusual upbringing, family dysfunction, and some terrible things she experienced. She also describes her first experience in a classroom at age 17 and how she was able to overcome obstacles to attend college and eventually graduate with a PhD in history. Her parents happen to be Mormon, but the book is not intended to be about Mormonism. Anyway, I could hardly put the book down. It’s really well-written and a pretty gripping story. I found I could relate to bits of her upbringing in small ways.
I’m guessing some of you have read this book? Please share with us here about other books you’ve read and found helpful or interesting.
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Post by happytobefree on Aug 16, 2021 19:12:52 GMT
Not a book, but Google TS Eliot’s short poem “The Hippopotamus.” The fleshy, earthy, imperfect, mortal hippo transcends while the “True Church” remains below. The poem is kinda paradoxical and kinda satirical but packs a punch on High Church / haughty church (which the prc kinda is)
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Post by questioneverything on Aug 16, 2021 19:28:08 GMT
Not a book, but Google TS Eliot’s short poem “The Hippopotamus.” The fleshy, earthy, imperfect, mortal hippo transcends while the “True Church” remains below. The poem is kinda paradoxical and kinda satirical but packs a punch on High Church / haughty church (which the prc kinda is) Yeah, kinda.
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Post by prnolonger on Aug 16, 2021 20:36:01 GMT
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Books
Aug 16, 2021 23:39:05 GMT
via mobile
Post by carmensandiego on Aug 16, 2021 23:39:05 GMT
Thanks for the recommendations!
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Post by psalm23 on Aug 20, 2021 11:47:00 GMT
+1 Unfollow by Megan Phelps-Roper
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Post by carmensandiego on Aug 29, 2021 2:37:30 GMT
I finished reading “The Glass Castle” recently and really enjoyed it. The writing isn’t quite as rich as Westover’s “Educated”, but it was nevertheless quite good. Very interesting, sad, and thought provoking all at the same time. Thanks again for the recommendation, prnolonger.
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Post by Sophia M. on Sept 2, 2021 2:36:32 GMT
Women Talking by Miram Toews. Very close to home in how the author narrates a story about the incredible stress and pressure put upon women and children to figure out how to survive and move forward in life, with very few geographical or financial options to get away from the sexual abuse perpetrated upon their children by the menfolk. Fiction based on a historical event, and written by a person who grew up in an insular Mennonite community, which has many cultural similarities to our insular sub-culture of Protestant Reformed christians.
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Post by fellowhuman on Sept 3, 2021 23:32:32 GMT
I've held back posting in here because I haven't read (or haven't finished) books relevant to this topic. With that in mind, here are some books that are highly recommended in exvangelical circles:
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel VanderKolk
Leaving the Fold by Marlene Winell
Becoming Safely Embodied by Dierdre Fay
Lost Connections by Johann Hari
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Post by Regina•Phalange on Sept 10, 2021 13:35:51 GMT
Thanks all! I have a lot of reading to do. As a heads up, Amazon does let you download samples of most of these books. I’m viewing them on my kindle app to verify which ones I’m going to purchase.
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Post by dontdoxmebro on Sept 22, 2021 21:46:49 GMT
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Post by JohnOrange on Sept 22, 2021 23:20:07 GMT
Books ... some might consider this text a step too far, but I found the Gospel of Thomas transformative. I read it and said wow, a version of Christianity (or Jesus movement) whose foundational principle is not "you are a miserable, broken, helpless person with no ability, and you must join a group that will tell you what's what". Instead, it presents (purported) sayings of Jesus that invite us to think clearly, recognize reality, learn from others, have self-awareness, be willing to learn (and to be disturbed by the new knowledge), avoid blind leaders who lead the blind, etc. Some of the sayings are kind of esoteric, but so what, dismiss them if they're not immediately resonant; there will be many more that are resonant.
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Post by theycallmetheseeker on Sept 23, 2021 1:38:01 GMT
Agree point for point...although took me a few years later than college to find these.
Funnily enough, the apocryphal books are what actually got me looking more critically at the books in the bible. Also "Zealot" by Aslan granted a different perspective of someone (a Muslim) who dedicated a good chunk of his life to studying Jesus of Nazareth.
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Post by Sophia M. on Oct 5, 2021 14:43:16 GMT
I am part way through this book and it is pretty intense. www.goodreads.com/review/show/2630774332 It is really a good reminder that dehumanizing and deadly subjugation of women crosses religions, cultures, continents and generations. Sometimes it is easier to see in other cultures and harder to see when it is happening in our own extended or immediate family, but there is so much in common between this story and stories I've heard or experienced within my own subculture. I like this quote from the review: "What I loved about this book is that despite it being women-focused, there are glimpses into this cycle of oppression even from the male perspective. It's a subtle nod, but it's obvious that both men and women struggle with keeping up with the traditions and culture." Child caregiving, cooking in a household kitchen, and cleaning your own living space are all very humanizing and valuable uses of time . . but they are curses if they are roles assigned to specific humans who don't get the choice, agency, or allowance to set boundaries, take turns with others, get respite times or spaces, or say "not at all" or "not so much" or "yes, but also." A community who invites people into Christ's service (pulling an easy yoke, carrying a burden that is light) gives good news to women who have been shackled to restrictive roles by whatever culture, tradition, or religion. I've been part of an egalitarian marriage for 20+ years and our children get to observe care and service given by both parents in this household. They see both parents taking turns on different days or years: helping with homework and driving kids to extracurricular activities, involved in church leadership and service, cooking and washing dishes, and earning money in professional settings. They have seen both parents in different seasons of life stay at home to tend children or household, work from home, and work out of the home. It isn't a waste of time for either adult to do the laundry or load the dishwasher, and not a waste of time for either adult to pursue a graduate degree in order to learn new wisdom or gain new vocational expertise. The chores and responsibilities given to kids don't get assigned b/c of gender, but their age level. It does and can work. The "what if" fear that many have is: if nobody in a household is forced to do the "domestic" activities, nobody would do it. In my experience, what happens instead is that everyone is discovers joy and satisfaction in doing the "domestic" activities, when it is shared, when it isn't what one person is required to do all day everyday, when it isn't treated as gendered activity, but human activity.
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Books
Oct 6, 2021 4:16:56 GMT
via mobile
maggie likes this
Post by carmensandiego on Oct 6, 2021 4:16:56 GMT
I am part way through this book and it is pretty intense. www.goodreads.com/review/show/2630774332… Child caregiving, cooking in a household kitchen, and cleaning your own living space are all very humanizing and valuable uses of time . . but they are curses if they are roles assigned to specific humans who don't get the choice, agency, or allowance to set boundaries, take turns with others, get respite times or spaces, or say "not at all" or "not so much" or "yes, but also." A community who invites people into Christ's service (pulling an easy yoke, carrying a burden that is light) gives good news to women who have been shackled to restrictive roles by whatever culture, tradition, or religion. I've been part of an egalitarian marriage for 20+ years and our children get to observe care and service given by both parents in this household. They see both parents taking turns on different days or years: helping with homework and driving kids to extracurricular activities, involved in church leadership and service, cooking and washing dishes, and earning money in professional settings. They have seen both parents in different seasons of life stay at home to tend children or household, work from home, and work out of the home. It isn't a waste of time for either adult to do the laundry or load the dishwasher, and not a waste of time for either adult to pursue a graduate degree in order to learn new wisdom or gain new vocational expertise. The chores and responsibilities given to kids don't get assigned b/c of gender, but their age level. It does and can work. The "what if" fear that many have is: if nobody in a household is forced to do the "domestic" activities, nobody would do it. In my experience, what happens instead is that everyone is discovers joy and satisfaction in doing the "domestic" activities, when it is shared, when it isn't what one person is required to do all day everyday, when it isn't treated as gendered activity, but human activity. The book sounds really interesting — thank you for the recommendation!! I also reallly like what you’ve written above. Well said, and I really resonate with your thoughts on domestic duties being less “gendered.”
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