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Post by freefromprc on Jun 1, 2016 14:44:58 GMT
And what, start completely over from husband to children, friends, not even speaking about financially. It is virtually impossible unless my family comes with and supports it. Its not worth it to me to start over this way. I'm right there with you Crusader. I feel exactly the same way you do. I want to leave too, but, week after week we go through the same motions. I never feel spiritual uplifted after church is done. I too am terribly afraid I will lose family, friends if I try to leave at this point. Its a hard decision. For myself it took a very long time. Years. I think it is a lot easier for a man to leave. PR women are trained to be keepers at home (Titus, of course), however, in some (many?) cases, the reason it is taught is to keep women suppressed. It removes any tools a woman would otherwise have to become self sufficient in the event of some sort of catastrophe - such as leaving this cult. A free thinking woman in the PRC is a threat to the mens club, and is strictly forbidden. When a little girl is taught from very early on that her place is to serve some man in her future, by the time she reaches those 'years of discretion' she is completely programmed to submit to men, no matter how they behave or what they do. It is a massive undertaking to break free of those chains, and not only realize mentally that you were taught a lie, but to actually emotionally free yourself from that twisted training. Then to go forward and face those same men, the very men you were taught to hold in the highest esteem and tell them that you choose to disagree with them - it is virtually impossible. Add the loss of your family, children, spouse - it can become insurmountable. All that being said, bondage by fear is a false bondage, living what you REALLY believe is freedom. It is amazing how much support there is from people who have not been programmed in the PRC. They actually do understand. PR people are not accustomed to openly discussing their true feelings with another person. In the PRC, everyone must live conforming to the PR mold. Real freedom is living openly and honestly. The chains of bondage are NOT outside the PRC as we were taught from infancy, the chains of bondage are the PRC.
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Hello
Jun 5, 2016 14:49:40 GMT
Post by crusader on Jun 5, 2016 14:49:40 GMT
And what, start completely over from husband to children, friends, not even speaking about financially. It is virtually impossible unless my family comes with and supports it. Its not worth it to me to start over this way. I'm right there with you Crusader. I feel exactly the same way you do. I want to leave too, but, week after week we go through the same motions. I never feel spiritual uplifted after church is done. I too am terribly afraid I will lose family, friends if I try to leave at this point. There is a hope that it will change, but years go by and no change comes. It is easier to just play the part.
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Hello
Aug 4, 2017 19:47:33 GMT
Post by soldierofChrist on Aug 4, 2017 19:47:33 GMT
So sad to read these accounts from last year and praying that situations will be different for you all by now. However bleak things seem REMEMBER, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will not fear for You are with me:) God promises to be with those whom He has set His love upon? It will not always feel that was though deep down it can as we remember His beautiful promises:) If you are still trapped and there just seems to be no way out then be courageous, wise, and you will need to devote yourself to Christ all the more. Find ways to look at the situation and reach out with Christ's love: giving but not expecting nor demanding anything in return. Pray that things will change but not in a way that your very being and health depends on the change itself if you see what I mean. A kind of Lord if it is at all possible, take this cup from me but not as I will but your will be done.
Oh, I pray that everyone reading this, whether ppl trapped in the system of PRC, ppl who have escaped but are still feeling the hurt and the harm and the repercussions I just want to say you you that God IS good: always. He has a perfect plan that He is working out and just as Christ went through suffering (at a level we can't comprehend) so, at times, according to His good pleasure we must too and we likely won't be able to always comprehend this either, BUT trust God! He knows what He is doing:)
If you are a PRCA member, deacon, elder, minister, theologian, my heart goes out to you too. Your denomination could be God honouring. Renounce your views concerning the denial of the unfeigned call. Reread the Canon of Dordt. Serious is mentioned in the second part of the statement in the canon. You are actually not even dealing honestly with your own creed!
unfeigned
ʌnˈfeɪnd/Submit adjective genuine; sincere. "a broad smile of unfeigned delight" synonyms: sincere, genuine, real, true, honest, authentic, unaffected, unpretended, unforced, uncontrived, artless, candid, frank, bona fide, earnest, heartfelt, wholehearted, deep, from the heart;
But more than that, MUCH more than that: embrace Sola Scriptura. You need to get back to the Scriptures ALONE as the authority. Sure there is a place for a good creed, I am NOT saying there is not. But don't stop there. Go to God. Seek the Lord while He may be found. Embrace Christ:) May the Love and truth of God flood your souls that you would know the truth and that His truth would set you free! I sincerely want the best for you:)
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Hello
Aug 5, 2017 21:08:21 GMT
Post by freefromprc on Aug 5, 2017 21:08:21 GMT
So sad to read these accounts from last year and praying that situations will be different for you all by now. However bleak things seem REMEMBER, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will not fear for You are with me:) God promises to be with those whom He has set His love upon? It will not always feel that was though deep down it can as we remember His beautiful promises:) If you are still trapped and there just seems to be no way out then be courageous, wise, and you will need to devote yourself to Christ all the more. Find ways to look at the situation and reach out with Christ's love: giving but not expecting nor demanding anything in return. Pray that things will change but not in a way that your very being and health depends on the change itself if you see what I mean. A kind of Lord if it is at all possible, take this cup from me but not as I will but your will be done. Oh, I pray that everyone reading this, whether ppl trapped in the system of PRC, ppl who have escaped but are still feeling the hurt and the harm and the repercussions I just want to say you you that God IS good: always. He has a perfect plan that He is working out and just as Christ went through suffering (at a level we can't comprehend) so, at times, according to His good pleasure we must too and we likely won't be able to always comprehend this either, BUT trust God! He knows what He is doing:) If you are a PRCA member, deacon, elder, minister, theologian, my heart goes out to you too. Your denomination could be God honouring. Renounce your views concerning the denial of the unfeigned call. Reread the Canon of Dordt. Serious is mentioned in the second part of the statement in the canon. You are actually not even dealing honestly with your own creed! unfeigned ʌnˈfeɪnd/Submit adjective genuine; sincere. "a broad smile of unfeigned delight" synonyms: sincere, genuine, real, true, honest, authentic, unaffected, unpretended, unforced, uncontrived, artless, candid, frank, bona fide, earnest, heartfelt, wholehearted, deep, from the heart; But more than that, MUCH more than that: embrace Sola Scriptura. You need to get back to the Scriptures ALONE as the authority. Sure there is a place for a good creed, I am NOT saying there is not. But don't stop there. Go to God. Seek the Lord while He may be found. Embrace Christ:) May the Love and truth of God flood your souls that you would know the truth and that His truth would set you free! I sincerely want the best for you:) Creeds are fine. As long as people keep in mind that they are man's explanation of what they believe scripture says. The PRC will base complete sermons on creeds instead of Scripture. Each time they do this they get a little farther from actual scripture and pretty soon they are preaching and creating doctrines based on man's explanation of Scripture instead of Scripture itself.
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Post by soldierofChrist on Aug 6, 2017 7:36:23 GMT
So sad to read these accounts from last year and praying that situations will be different for you all by now. However bleak things seem REMEMBER, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will not fear for You are with me:) God promises to be with those whom He has set His love upon? It will not always feel that was though deep down it can as we remember His beautiful promises:) If you are still trapped and there just seems to be no way out then be courageous, wise, and you will need to devote yourself to Christ all the more. Find ways to look at the situation and reach out with Christ's love: giving but not expecting nor demanding anything in return. Pray that things will change but not in a way that your very being and health depends on the change itself if you see what I mean. A kind of Lord if it is at all possible, take this cup from me but not as I will but your will be done. Oh, I pray that everyone reading this, whether ppl trapped in the system of PRC, ppl who have escaped but are still feeling the hurt and the harm and the repercussions I just want to say you you that God IS good: always. He has a perfect plan that He is working out and just as Christ went through suffering (at a level we can't comprehend) so, at times, according to His good pleasure we must too and we likely won't be able to always comprehend this either, BUT trust God! He knows what He is doing:) If you are a PRCA member, deacon, elder, minister, theologian, my heart goes out to you too. Your denomination could be God honouring. Renounce your views concerning the denial of the unfeigned call. Reread the Canon of Dordt. Serious is mentioned in the second part of the statement in the canon. You are actually not even dealing honestly with your own creed! unfeigned ʌnˈfeɪnd/Submit adjective genuine; sincere. "a broad smile of unfeigned delight" synonyms: sincere, genuine, real, true, honest, authentic, unaffected, unpretended, unforced, uncontrived, artless, candid, frank, bona fide, earnest, heartfelt, wholehearted, deep, from the heart; But more than that, MUCH more than that: embrace Sola Scriptura. You need to get back to the Scriptures ALONE as the authority. Sure there is a place for a good creed, I am NOT saying there is not. But don't stop there. Go to God. Seek the Lord while He may be found. Embrace Christ:) May the Love and truth of God flood your souls that you would know the truth and that His truth would set you free! I sincerely want the best for you:) Creeds are fine. As long as people keep in mind that they are man's explanation of what they believe scripture says. The PRC will base complete sermons on creeds instead of Scripture. Each time they do this they get a little farther from actual scripture and pretty soon they are preaching and creating doctrines based on man's explanation of Scripture instead of Scripture itself. So true! They do have a needed place and I will add updating if and when required for the best expression or summary of what the Scriptures and as a defense against error. So I mean that I believe there is a need to express more fully a biblical response to so called 'Theistic Evolution' and here's another: 'Open Theism'. Those are two examples. Yes. you are so right because PRCA's method solidly locks the Scriptures into a frozen time warp because there is a depth to the Scriptures and they rob themselves and the ppl. So sad! We have to learn from this ie not to do or look for similar features in a replacement church OR swing (as humanity is want to do and imbibe something equally as bad or worse in the opposite extreme, well extreme is the wrong word as PRCA are not at the extreme end, There is worse, I mean you keep going down that line further and further and it will take you to eg full blown Fatalism. May God grant you His peace and love and wisdom and grace:) Shine for Him:)
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Post by maggie on May 7, 2018 18:03:38 GMT
I found this site a few days ago and have read through many of the threads. I have to say I have found it incredibly cathartic, as so many of the experiences relayed here are so similar to what my wife and I experienced. I just wanted to take a few minutes to introduce myself and tell you my story. My wife was born and raised in the PRC. She's from a big family, almost all of whom are in the PRC today. I was not raised PR, but was raised in a good Christian home. When I met my wife, I fell in love with her very quickly and she felt the same way about me. This was obviously a touchy situation, as I wasn't from a "pure church," and our relationship was kind of stuck for a time. We went on for a while as simply "friends," but we had great discussions and it was obvious we were both searching for something deeper than what we had. My wife was yearning for something more than just doctrinal knowledge. She wanted to talk with other Christians about her struggles and how to grow personally in the faith. She was also really frustrated by the young people in the PRC, who attended church faithfully twice on Sunday and said all the right things, while engaging in personal behavior the rest of the week which violated even basic Christian standards. I actually wanted more doctrine at that stage of my life and thought the PRC might be the place for me. After a period of time, I decided to join the PRC. My wife and I dated for a couple years, then got married. At this point, we were probably seen as a great PR couple. My wife had proved her worth by "standing firm in the truth,", not leaving the church for a guy, and I was an example of someone who had come to see the light and had come to the truth. Behind the scenes, however, my wife and were really struggling with serious questions about the PRC. We came to strongly disagree with the position on divorce and remarriage. We had concerns about particular aspects of worship in the church. Most importantly, we came to really disagree with the manner in which PR people viewed and treated other Christians who were not a part of their denomination. The doctrine of the antithesis was actually applied to other Christians, including my family, which was not PR. We witnessed a situation where a family left the PRC when they moved out of the area and saw the pastor and elders in the church encourage the wife to leave her husband and move back to the area so she could attend a church that taught "the truth." They were actually encouraging her to abandon her husband and children! This shocked me. After a couple years of struggle, we made the painful decision to leave the PRC. This set off an extremely intense round of recriminations from my wife's family, our supposed friends in the church, and the church leadership. I won't post all the things that were said and done to us, but we were basically told our children (we didn't have any at that time), were likely to end up in hell due to our decision, we were being a horrible example to my wife's siblings, and we were "leaving the truth for the lie." Going forward, we were often shunned or simply not invited to family functions, ignored by people who we thought were our friends, and generally treated as outcasts. It was incredibly painful. This all happened more than 10 years ago. Today, my wife and I have a great marriage. We attend a terrific church. God has blessed with three beautiful children who are doing great. We have made wonderful friends who love us and are consistently there for us in challenging times, as we are for them. As many have posted on this site, we feel like we can breathe again and I cannot imagine any circumstance where we would ever go back to the PRC. Much of my wife's family is still PR. There are still hard feelings there. However, some of her family members are also starting to leave the PRC as well. The dam is slowly starting to break as they are finding freedom in Christ outside the walls of this denomination. I think part of the reason the PRC is so tough on those who leave is if they show any softness or understanding when people leave the church, they know huge numbers of people will flood out the door. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that many many people are in the PRC simply out of obligation and/or fear. Their hearts aren't in it. They would love to leave, but they can't bear the cost. We have had quite a few PR people whisper these kinds of sentiments to us over the years. I hope this doesn't come across as mean or vindictive, but it's my sincere hope and prayer that the PRC, as a denomination, falls apart, and the people in this denomination are able to find freedom in the gospel, as opposed to bondage to this denomination. I could say so much more, but I just want to thank those who have set up this site and those who post here. Despite the slander that you undoubtedly face from some in the PRC, you are doing a great thing. Wow, I am shocked about the family you mentioned and PR telling wife to come back minus husband and wife. That is a aweful thing.... Marriage a picture of Christ and his church and PR want to split that for the sake of getting one back to the fold? ? It boggles my mind what lengths they go through to keep their tentacles in people. I, too, believe many more would leave if they weren't afraid of the ramifications. Their actions contridict what the Bible says.
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Post by maggie on May 7, 2018 18:13:48 GMT
I am not praying for the demise of the P.R. church...I pray for a revival in their midst. There are tremendously good things to embrace and cherish in this culture....namely, the people. What I pray for is the move of the Holy Spirit to help people have the courage to "stay" in this religion and to just keep putting pressure on the system's that are not Christ like. I pray for JESUS to show Himself personally to them...and for His shepherding hand to really guide and help them along. I pray that the Holy Spirit would in turn then incorporate some of these wonderful qualities that are in this system...and turn them into a mighty burning fire of healing love and power. I pray that this particular culture or religious system would just be lit up in the love of God...lit on fire for His love and joy and peace. That's my hope for this PR system. The longing for God is within them, I've witnessed it and it's just...unfortunate that the doctrine's that define this system keep many of them in bondage to fear. I pray for a tremendous upheaval...for a burst of revelation for many of them...but, I pray they don't leave...but STAY. This would take a great move of the Holy Spirit...but, that is just what God does...MOVE. That won't happen until you get different ministers and elders out of there.
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Post by ichabod on May 8, 2018 8:26:52 GMT
Having read through many posts on this forum and contributed myself, I would like to take this opportunity to urge those who are PRC and have influence in the denomination to consider what has been discussed here. Burying one's head in the sand is not wise regarding some of the issues on this forum. These are REAL people with REAL stories. Please consider them. I graciously exhort you to do this. Listen to what is being said.
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Post by maggie on May 9, 2018 15:36:30 GMT
This makes me so sad. Why did you venture into this horrid site? Slanderers. Not helpful at all. They do not believe in the creation as God sets forth in scripture. Divorce AND remarriage is okay. This is the dark path..... They try and say the PRC is a cult. To us...? It's called a guilty conscience. God judges. Not the ex prcs. Ohhhh, satan loves this site. Just remember, anyone who adds or takes away from Gods word will answer. That is terrifying. Read what you just wrote... Where is Gods love in your life? You think saten loves this site. Saten loves your church also because it's full of people who hate other people. Saten loves your church cause your church teaches therebis not grace and no forgiveness. Saten loves your church because your church teaches to turn its back on family's. Just remember adding - dancing is a sin - movies are a sin - you can't sent your kids to a public school is a sin - and he list goes on.... Who's adding rules to the bible? Look hard look deep before you go on.... There are many PR's who go to dances, movies, etc and yes, adult PR's in their late 30's, 40's. How do I know?? Because after I left, saw 3 separate couples at a dance/bar/restaurant They were all dancing and one was a deacon and one had been a elder. And all of that is rampant with the high schoolers...One of my kids went to Covenant so I know. Problem is, parents just assume their kid isn't and turn a blind eye
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Post by notinacult on May 9, 2018 18:35:49 GMT
No those are the sins of youth. They can do whatever they want in the real world as long as they sit in a pr pew and grow up in a pr church and pay dues to a pr church. Read what you just wrote... Where is Gods love in your life? You think saten loves this site. Saten loves your church also because it's full of people who hate other people. Saten loves your church cause your church teaches therebis not grace and no forgiveness. Saten loves your church because your church teaches to turn its back on family's. Just remember adding - dancing is a sin - movies are a sin - you can't sent your kids to a public school is a sin - and he list goes on.... Who's adding rules to the bible? Look hard look deep before you go on.... There are many PR's who go to dances, movies, etc and yes, adult PR's in their late 30's, 40's. How do I know?? Because after I left, saw 3 separate couples at a dance/bar/restaurant They were all dancing and one was a deacon and one had been a elder. And all of that is rampant with the high schoolers...One of my kids went to Covenant so I know. Problem is, parents just assume their kid isn't and turn a blind eye
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Post by Skyfall on May 10, 2018 19:32:50 GMT
Having read through many posts on this forum and contributed myself, I would like to take this opportunity to urge those who are PRC and have influence in the denomination to consider what has been discussed here. Burying one's head in the sand is not wise regarding some of the issues on this forum. These are REAL people with REAL stories. Please consider them. I graciously exhort you to do this. Listen to what is being said. Thank you for posting this.
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