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Post by prnolonger on May 3, 2021 14:23:36 GMT
Conventions and everyone around me feeling safe and predictable... singing in church and just feeling that high of awe and gratitude that is hard to equal alone and through quiet contemplation or poetry... having an easy system for universal approval within the group (just follow these rules) - it didn't mean people would like me, but at least I could be tacitly respected... just having an easy system for life in general, even though it was so wrong... when I was among the indoctrinated I didn't have to worry about speaking my mind... more potential connections than I could hope for, so long as I avoided certain taboos... the halo effect around my heroes being unaffected by the reality of their failures and humanity - it was the Holy Spirit working in them, so they retained an aura of divinity that is no longer a reality in my world... not feeling like an outcast from American culture, knowing that there was a group I fit into and played a role in... there's so so much. I cannot ever imagine being PR or Christian again, but I cannot pretend that there are not things to miss, at least from my experience. As someone who is pretty much universally on the side of "not nostalgic whatsoever", your post is making me reconsider my position. You reached me on so many of your points. Wherever and whoever you are, I hope you're doing okay.
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Post by maggie on May 3, 2021 20:41:03 GMT
I like listening to organ music, so I naturally hear some religious songs here and there, and even some with the same tune as Psalter numbers. I came across a few songs like this the other night and went down a bit of a rabbithole and it all made me think of my days as an unwitting child growing up in the PRC. Family relations were all good, the W was president, school was what it was. The Red Wings were a dynasty. I would be curious to go back and spend a day in that world again, knowing what I know now. Part of me thinks I'd enjoy it and the other thinks I would be creeped out. Does anyone else here have similar feelings? Finding themselves (almost) wishing they could go back and live those days of blissful ignorance again? lol I like organ music but wouldn't go back there just to hear it
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Post by happytobefree on May 4, 2021 3:09:58 GMT
I missed the “instant connections” for a while; I had a very difficult time leaving my friends and having an instant bond with someone just by being pr. But we made new friends. Right now, I have a group of the closest friends I’ve ever had, and we don’t talk about the prc sermon or the prc news or the schools or what not. We can have differing opinions, we have different backgrounds, totally different childhood experiences... it makes life diverse, interesting, and sweet.
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